An Open Letter to Conservative Dads

If your adult child is telling you that she (because it’s most likely a daughter) is going to be voting for Kamala Harris and the Democrats this November, you need to cut off that child financially.

PUBLISHED ON

September 18, 2024

Getting your Trinity Audio player ready...

Dear Conservative Dad,

I know that you love your adult children. I have a few adult children myself, and my husband and I would do anything for them—as long as it is for their good, both temporally and eternally. We’d give our lives for them, both in service over a lifetime and literally; we would take a bullet for them. 

So, what I am about to say to you is not said lightly. But it needs to be said:

Orthodox. Faithful. Free.

Sign up to get Crisis articles delivered to your inbox daily

Email subscribe inline (#4)

If your adult child is telling you that she (because it’s most likely a daughter) is going to be voting for Kamala Harris and the Democrats this November, you need to cut off that child financially.

You must lovingly, tactfully, but firmly let that child know that you will no longer be supporting her with your hard-earned wages. If a child that you raised through the blood, sweat, and tears of the past couple of decades is about to help vote into the presidency a woman who opposes—and is set to destroy—all that you stand for (with potentially no coming back from it), then she doesn’t need or deserve your financial support while doing it.

Imagine a child working against the very hands that fed her, clothed her, housed her, kept her healthy. Imagine a child betraying the hearts that loved her, nurtured her, taught her about Jesus, and sacrificed everything they had for her out of pure love and precious duty. You and her mother have given her everything, and, sadly, she is not interested in your values, your ideals, or your way of life. That is her prerogative. But you don’t need to subsidize your own destruction.

If an adult child can so easily act against the best interests of her own father and family, and when all that you have slaved for is at real risk of being lost (from your 401K, and perhaps a business, to your beloved country which you taught her to love as a patriot), then why are you paying her rent, her insurance, her car payments, and perhaps even her vacations? If she is still living in the very home that you worked your whole life to provide for her, make her move out and find her own place.

It’s time to lovingly cut her off and let her live as the autonomous adult that she wants to be. It’s time for her to live in the world that she is about to create with her ill-advised and anti-Christian vote for the most radically leftist (and godless) candidate and Party that we have seen in our lifetime. It’s time for her to live in the world that she is about to create with her ill-advised and anti-Christian vote for the most radically leftist (and godless) candidate and Party that we have seen in our lifetime.Tweet This

She needs to accept the consequences of her choices and her vote, a vote which will be part of the nail in the coffin of all that you have worked to provide for her comfort and happiness. It’s okay to stop paying. It’s necessary, and it’s just. 

Now, please understand. I am not suggesting that you cut her out of your life. Not at all. You can and should still love her and keep a relationship with her. She is welcome in your home and your hearts. I am only suggesting that, like every generation before this one, you allow your adult child to own her own actions, live the way she believes, and stand on her own two feet now, without any more of your financial help. She wants Kamala Harris to lead America in a new direction, and she needs to live independently in that world that she is helping to create.

Will it be easy to cut her off financially? No. But life is never easy, and the Lord Himself promised a heavy cross. He also said that there would come a time when parents and their children would be divided about things that matter more than blood, and that is not a bad thing: “Whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me” (Matthew 10:37). Jesus also said:

Do you think that I have come to give peace on earth? No, I tell you, but rather division…they will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against her mother… (Luke 12:51-53) 

Jesus foretold of persecution that would come to those who stand strong in the Faith when the world opposes them: “Children will rise against parents and have them put to death” (Mark 13:12). Your daughter may not put you to death literally, but in voting against everything you stand for, and all you have worked for, isn’t that a kind of “killing” you? Your response to that—cutting off the gravy train for good—isn’t extreme. It’s actually mild, considering. 

Please be strong. Be a man. Don’t allow the manipulation and disrespect to continue. Love her still, but grow your spine and close the money spigot. 

I will add a word about your adult sons, who (I pray!) are not inclined to vote for a radical feminist like Harris—one who turns against her own feminine nature in so many ways and disdains masculine men:

Tell your adult sons to vote. Most young men in this nation do not vote. They are beaten down, emasculated, demoralized. But they are the massive voting bloc that can negate the damage done by single, liberal women in this election. Exhort your sons to vote in November. They are the key to keeping this nation out of the hands of anti-Catholic communists. Literally, they have that collective power. Talk to your adult sons and explain this, and exhort them to fulfill their obligation as men and citizens.

You can do all of this, dear father. You have brought your children up this far, and you have sacrificed so much. Everything I have said here is not only for your children’s temporal welfare but also for the good of their eternal souls. Please don’t stop because you are weary or afraid of the consequences. Your family needs you. Your country needs you. We all need you. Stand up and be the good, strong man that you have always been for your family—the man that God calls you to be.

Sincerely, 

A Conservative Woman (speaking for millions of women like me) 

Author

  • Leila Miller

    Leila Miller is a wife, mother, grandmother, writer. Her books include Primal Loss: The Now-Adult Children of Divorce Speak; Raising Chaste Catholic Men; Made This Way: How to Prepare Kids to Face Today’s Tough Moral Issues; and Impossible Marriages Redeemed. She resides in Phoenix, and blogs at LeilaMiller.net and also has a YouTube channel.

Join the Conversation

Comments are a benefit for financial supporters of Crisis. If you are a monthly or annual supporter, please login to comment. A Crisis account has been created for you using the email address you used to donate.

Donate

1 thought on “An Open Letter to Conservative Dads”

  1. My personal experience has been that parents who stand up for their beliefs will eventually be thanked for it by their adult children, if the children have any brains at all.

Editor's picks

Item added to cart.
0 items - $0.00

Orthodox. Faithful. Free.

Signup to receive new Crisis articles daily

Email subscribe stack
Share to...