On (Un)Civil Discourse 

One good thing about teaching sixth grade is that there is a known standard of behavior and I can hold my students accountable. If only that were true for our so-called leaders. 

Three recent examples: on May 17, during a House Committee hearing concerning Attorney General Merrick Garland, GOP Rep. Marjorie Greene made a comment on the trial of President Trump. Democratic Rep. Jasmine Crockett asked what that had to do with the business at hand. Then we had the following exchange: 

Rep. Greene: “I don’t know what you’re here for. I think your fake eyelashes are messing up what you’re reading.” 

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez: “That is absolutely unacceptable. How dare you attack the physical appearance of another person. Move (i.e., strike) her words down.”

Rep. Greene: “Aw, are your feelings hurt?” 

Rep. Ocasio-Cortez: “Oh girl, baby girl, don’t even play.”

Rep. Greene: “Baby girl? I don’t think so.”  

In early July, with rumors that she had said that President Biden couldn’t win her state, Gov. Gretchen Whitmer of Michigan posted on social media (yes, in writing for all to see), “They’re full of s___.” 

Then, on July 22, GOP Representative Nancy Mace of South Carolina was grilling Secret Service Director Kimberly Cheatle for alleged failures in that agency’s protection of President Donald Trump during the assassination attempt. Director Cheatle was being evasive. Finally, Rep. Mace interrupted Director Cheatle by stating “You’re full of s___.” 

Were Rep. Greene in my class, she would have been told to stand in the corner with her nose against the wall, and she would not have been allowed to go out for recess. Were Gov. Whitmer in my class, she would have been suspended. Were Rep. Mace in my class, I would have had to call her parents and schedule a conference. Is this what we’ve come to? Grown men and women acting like children with an attack of the “hangries”?

Boorish behavior is nothing new and certainly not in politics; but as Chesterton said, one mark of good manners is having a sense of where you are. That “where” includes time, place, your position, and the position of the person you are addressing. 

Now, I was raised on a golf course. I played rugby for three years and had a stint in the Army. I teach at an all-boys school and have an eighteen-year-old son. Nothing you could say would make me blush. But clearly, we have gone too far. 

The behavior and language we are now accustomed to seeing and hearing is crude, petty, and childish. Yes, it’s been increasing in our daily experience for some time. It’s in the shows we watch and the music we listen to. We shrug and say, “Well, I guess that’s how it is today.” And now that’s how it is in civic discourse. It needs to stop. 

I fully understand the passion. There are momentous issues at stake. There always are because we are dealing with the direction of our nation, the lives of our children, the ability to live our faith, and so many other concerns. All the more reason to act and speak with reason and respect. 

One of the purposes of politics is persuasion. We are not persuading others when we call them names and insult them. We’re simply feeding our egos. It does nothing to advance our cause; instead, it turns the attention from the matter at hand to ourselves, which is always a sign of immaturity. 

Looking back at the examples given (and I could cite others; just listen to talk radio or the “news”), Rep. Greene, Gov. Whitmer, and Rep. Mace did nothing to help their position; they merely revealed how self-centered they were. Their comments were out of place for where they were and who they are. 

Passion does not exclude charity or decorum. Few men in American history were more passionate than Martin Luther King, Jr. But whatever his personal shortcomings may have been, his public words and behavior were as exemplary as they were moving. His comportment had a signal effect in the success of the civil rights movement. Ronald Reagan, too, was passionate; yet he was also one of the most gracious and persuasive of men. 

I also recognize the need for candid speech. As a Catholic, I am tired of the talk of “reproductive rights” and “sexual identity.” I also try—and sometimes it’s hard—to remember where I am and whom I’m with, as well as that the object is to get to the truth. When it comes to public speakers and speaking in public, does anyone on any side think he or she is going to move others by calling them names or mocking them? 

G.K. Chesterton, who should be canonized solely on the basis of his kindness toward those with whom he disagreed vehemently, said that the worst of using strong language is that it produces weak language. Blunt language, like a blunt knife, soon becomes useless when overused. Once you’ve called someone a neo-Nazi, where do you go from there?  G.K. Chesterton, who should be canonized solely on the basis of his kindness toward those with whom he disagreed vehemently, said that the worst of using strong language is that it produces weak language. Tweet This

I’m not advocating tea-table talk, and I know politics is not for those with thin skins; but the English language is rich enough for grown men and women to use words in public which do not have to be bleeped out when played later. 

Winston Churchill, another passionate man, knew how to do it. He once described his political opponent Clement Attlee as “a sheep in sheep’s clothing.” When warned about the rules of Parliament prohibiting accusations of lying, he charged a member with “terminological inexactitude.” The current political discourse resembles nothing more than fifth graders standing off and shouting, “Oh, yeah? So’s your old man.”

It’s fine to be pointed, but make a point. If you’re going to cut, be incisive. I remember Jeane Kirkpatrick’s speech to the 1984 Republican Convention. It was compelling, forceful, and one of the most persuasive speeches ever given. Her measured tone gave power to her words. Her reference to the other side as “San Francisco Democrats” was as close as she ever came to name-calling. Her repetition of the phrase, “but they always blame America first” was brilliant rhetoric and one of the torpedoes that sunk Mondale’s campaign. 

It’s no good saying, “But the other side started it.” One hallmark of maturity is to know how many things don’t require your comment. Or, as Ronald Knox once said eloquently but bluntly, “Sometimes we need to pray for the grace just to shut up.” It’s been said that a foul tongue reveals a lot more about you than about the one you’re up against.

If I were advising Trump, I’d give him the advice given by Vince Lombardi to a player who danced in the end zone after scoring a touchdown: “Next time, act like you’ve been there before.” He has been there before; so, act and speak like a president and a statesman. Act and speak like a man who can lead all the American people. We need that. 

We want to restore Christian Civilization, but we must first have a civilization. We must first have a place where men and women know how to be civil. There is plenty of room in that for zeal and spirit and, yes, even anger. It can be spoken eloquently, strongly, and persuasively without abuse and insults. It would be good if we all started learning that.