The Roots of Modern Female Immodesty

Recently, Shane Gillis made headlines for saying on Saturday Night Live that women at the gym dress like whores.

Naturally, this received a lot of backlash from women who go to the gym in minimal, extremely tight clothing that, until recent years, would have led most to agree with Gillis’ description.

Much of the criticism of Gillis is from radical feminists who screech at even the mildest critique of a woman’s behavior, let alone a man saying what women shouldn’t wear in public. Even many Christian women immediately push back if a man is bold enough to speak out against immodesty. But what is the right reaction among conservative Christians, especially men, when another man says something like this?

Think about the fact that it’s a comedian saying this. That’s no coincidence; his observation is an uncomfortable truth, a comedian’s bread and butter. The reason it’s uncomfortable is that for decades men have been completely shunned from the modesty conversation, even in conservative and Catholic circles.

If you’re a man, your opinion on modesty is not welcome, because you can’t understand “what women go through” or don’t have “personal experience.” This sort of attitude pits men and women against each other, when in reality men and women must assist one another on the path to Heaven. This opposition is rooted in feminist thinking that must be completely rejected in Catholic communities. Absolutely nothing will change if men are not leading the crusade against immodesty.

However, men should not go around calling women whores. It was wrong of Shane Gillis to do that, comedian or not. Most women who are dressing immodestly are not consciously thinking about trying to attract attention from men. Many are responding to something in their life that has made them subconsciously need attention and validation from men.

According to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, 1 in 5 women in the U.S. has “experienced completed or attempted rape,” and 1 in 3 of those victims were first assaulted between the ages of 11 and 17. This is obviously tragic, and it may certainly be a factor in the clothing choices of these victims; women who have survived such an experience—especially as an adolescent—view their bodies and their sexuality in a disordered way that can result in a subconscious need to attract the attention of men.

In 2024, a study by The Barna Group showed that 44% of U.S. women—and 40% of Christian women—watch pornography. In the 28-43 age group of millennials, that number jumps to 67%. The long-standing assumption that porn is only a men’s problem needs to die. Young women fall prey to porn as well, and porn is entirely centered around making the woman’s body an object to be used by men. Beyond objectifying women in men’s heads, it also makes women subconsciously objectify themselves. They watch videos of women just like them being given affection based on how promiscuous they are, which creates assumptions about what will bring attention from men.

Over half of sexually experienced U.S. women ages 25-49 have had five or more sexual partners. Usually, these partners are men who have also had numerous previous sexual partners of their own. The promiscuous women realize that these men are only looking for pleasure and want them solely for their bodies. Therefore, they show off the sexualized parts of their bodies in order to score another man. Again, these intentions are largely subconscious.

These are not small issues. These are problems that, with varying degrees of responsibility on the woman’s part, cause a broken relationship with her body and the way she views attention from men. With so many women facing these problems, a culture of immodest dressing takes hold. This culture is passed down to younger girls who, despite not having fallen victim to sexual immorality, feel they will be out of place and not in style unless they dress immodestly.

All this is to say, compassion and tact are necessary when discussing modesty. At its core, it isn’t just a small, silly issue of too many women wearing tights. There are big problems at play here. But men still must not be silent. The immodesty exacerbates all the other problems, and harms men’s relationships with women as well. That makes it the purview of men.

So, if it is men’s duty to address the immodesty problem, how should they do it? Firstly, with courage. There will be backlash any time a man addresses the topic of immodesty on the part of women. We must remember that souls are lost to sexual sins every day, and to fight against them is to have charity toward those souls.

Secondly, any time sins involving the sixth and ninth commandments are addressed, prudence is needed. I personally do not think that a man should single out any specific woman other than his wife or his daughter with an expectation of more modest dress. Of course, it is his duty to make sure his wife and daughters are dressing modestly. If your wife dresses immodestly, you are failing to lead your household in virtue. However, it is also the job of men publicly to call out immodesty in general in their community, without naming specific women.

Finally, men must recognize the underlying problems. If you are requiring your daughters to dress modestly but have accidentally allowed them to watch pornography or sleep around, you are fighting a losing battle. The root causes of immodesty are less public than the immodesty itself, and much more important.

As men, we cannot blackpill and see every woman who misunderstands her body as broken or useless. That is the worldview the devil wants us to adopt. The world is a messy place, and more young people than not have fallen into habits of grave sexual sin. Because there is a cult that celebrates this depravity and lifts those people onto a pedestal in their sin, it is easy to want to tear them down as worthless. This is not the Christian way. The Way is Christ, who said, “Go, and sin no more” (John 8:11).

As for women, it is natural to be upset about name-calling. But Christian women must understand the gravity of the situation. This isn’t something that can be blown off with a quick, “Well, you shouldn’t be looking!” This is a serious issue that is rooted in even more serious problems, and it needs to be addressed and fixed.

That may mean that it will be necessary to have hard conversations with a close friend, your husband, or your priest to find the root cause of why you feel the need to dress in a way that demands men’s attention toward your body. Be assured that good Christian men will be grateful, and what’s more, you will be better able to face Judgment Day without any guilt of having led your Christian brothers into sin. The devil would rather you keep pushing your problems under the rug and blaming others. He wants you to continue to rely on male attention for validation and to keep leading others into sin. “Resist him, steadfast in your faith” (1 Peter 5:9).