All Hands on Deck

Thanks to Kevin T. DiCamillo for his recent Crisis article titled “Looking for a New Parish—and Crossing Some Off the List.” I suspect his search for a decent parish resonates with many of us who have been similarly disappointed. Our search for the numinous in the very Church in which it supposedly resides has left us feeling orphaned. 

Kevin’s article articulates familiar frustrations. Beauty, reverence, and tradition are good and necessary and should be present in every Mass, but they aren’t always. Parish life should be characterized by joyful and faithful service and big, functional, happy families who live the Faith—but it often isn’t. I’ve been ruminating about this idea of parish searching for some years now, and his article provides a good springboard to share my more recent sentiments.

For decades, I was like most faithful, observant Catholic laymen—I was looking for the “best” parish in my area to bring my family to so that the formation I was providing my children at home would be supported and enriched by my parish life. Dammit, why can’t you just act like you really believe it all? If you want us to believe in the Real Presence, stop the banal (or worse, irreverent) atmosphere and give us a little solemnity? Stop singing “The Rainbow Connection” as a Communion meditation! Why are all the ministries dominated by grumpy Boomers who exude territorialism rather than the love of Our Lord?

But something happened on the way to my search for utopia. I realized that the Church is not a cruise ship whose purpose is to cater to my particular desires, however orthodox, righteous, and correct they may be. Rather, it is a battleship where everyone on board has duties and a role to play. And too many of us aren’t doing our duty. We’re sitting at the bar, grousing because it’s our turn to use the shuffleboard court and the louts who have been playing for an hour are still there.

In 2018, Msgr. Charles Pope wrote an article that contrasted two views of the Church: a cruise ship or a battleship. Those with a “the Church is a cruise ship” view tend to see the Church as a place whose primary purpose is to provide a safe space for God’s people to, well, be. It places few demands on us, the laity, and we tend to expect to be served—by our pastors and priests, by the hierarchy, by the choir/cantors, and by everyone else whose volunteerism impacts how much we enjoy Sunday Mass or how welcome we feel. 

If the choir doesn’t sing the hymns we like, we feel entitled to complain. If we don’t feel sufficiently welcomed by the greeter at the door or if the homily is boring, banal, or irrelevant, we are put out and go somewhere else. “Go where you are fed” is the mantra of today’s Catholic, and if your local parish isn’t cutting it, you are justified in going to a different parish with (insert your reason here: a more charismatic priest, better singers, and so on).

I used to be more sympathetic to this view, and I actually do think there are good reasons for people to “parish hop.” If heresy or lax faith is being taught, and particularly if you have children who are being (mal)formed by this, then I think that might be a good enough reason to ditch Fr. Milquetoast in favor of the strong, charismatic, traditionalist priest at the parish 25 minutes away.

By contrast, those with a “battleship” mentality realize that we are all officers in His army—not foot soldiers, and certainly not camp followers who enjoy the perks of being around an army without having to do any of the work ourselves. No, we are officers, and that means we’re partially responsible for the success of the campaign. It doesn’t all rest on your pastor’s shoulders, nor should it. Actually, it never did; but our obsession with clericalism makes us think it did.

Yes, we are in a hierarchical Church, and if our pastors are, say, social workers in Roman collars (pink), or flaming homosexuals (lavender), that’s going to set a tone that won’t truck at all with Catholic men (because if you’re in your mid-30s or older and still an observant Catholic, I’m betting you’re a heterosexual, politically conservative-leaning man who wants a more manly Catholicism). There’s probably not much you can do with such men as your pastor.

But what if your priest is merely uninspiring (beige)? What does this mean for those of you in an “average” parish? Your pastor isn’t preaching heresy, and he’s basically a good guy. But all your friends left for the parish in the next town because of the priest there. He’s more (fill in the blank: traditional, dynamic, inspiring, charismatic, etc.). Should you go, too—“go where you’re fed”?

No.

I submit to you that perhaps you’ve fed enough and it’s time to start feeding others. Take the Great Commission seriously and step up within your run-of-the-mill parish and help transform it into the parish you want it to be. 

Can you sing? Join the choir (I’m quite certain they need you). Can you read and speak well? Become a lector. Do you know and love the Catholic Faith? Teach religious education. Have you learned a thing or two about Christian Marriage in your 25 years of wedded bliss? Help out with marriage prep or mentor a young couple. 

Stop sponging off the good work being done by too few people. Stop looking for a charismatic priest to follow or one who prioritizes the liturgy as much as you want. Stop grousing, and start leading. Get involved. It’s sorely needed in modern American society, and it’s cheaper than therapy.